Day 3 - I am thankful for takeout
Today was one of those days ...
Just as I was heading out the door, I got the dreaded "do I have any clean uniform pants?"
That crisis was averted [meaning someone wore a skirt and leggings] and off I drove.
It was not an overly chaotic day at the office, just full. I left on time, picked up from after school care and landed home a few minutes after 5. Zapped something for the girls, walked the dog, made a cup of coffee and headed back out.
Delivered Pampered Chef orders and attended a PTO meeting. Arrived home to jump right into homework and get that load of uniforms in the washer.
I've checked backpacks, signed reading logs, sorted some mail and 1 of the many piles on the peninsula. The laundry has made its way to the dryer and I'm sitting, finally, at my desk ... deciding where we are ordering from ... Subway? Irenes? Chinese? Somewhere for sure, because I definitely don't have cooking dinner in me right now.
Day 3 - I am thankful for takeout ... I am SO thankful for TAKEOUT
11.03.2016
11.02.2016
Commute
Day 2 - I am thankful for my morning commute
For the last nine years I worked at CSC, I worked remotely, in other words, from home. I know that working from home can sound really glamorous ... working when ever you want, conference calls in your PJs, stuff like that. Don't get me wrong - there was a lot of greatness about it. I thought my morning commute was a positive, I mean it involved walking from the kitchen to the corner of the dining room .. literally seconds and great for fuel economy.
Then I got a job that I needed to actually go to, every day! It is a SHORT, easy commute for me, less than 20 min door to door. I have a safe and reliable car and I really like my job and co-workers, the drive was never a chore.
Sometime in August, after a particularly hectic morning routine at home, I had a bit of an epiphany. This drive every morning is an opportunity to settle myself ... to leave the chaos of 4 people getting ready to head out for the day behind and start the process of charting my course for my work day.
I mostly drive on I-395 but just before I arrive to campus, I turn on this secondary road through a neighborhood. I see the dad and his tiny human waiting for the bus. I drive a little further and I see another dad with his 2 black labs - an old timer and a not so old timer - and his 2 kids. Sometimes the son manages the old timer's leash. I drive a little bit farther, almost to campus, and I find my favorites. There is this adorable elderly couple that walks, holding hands. Seeing them in the morning, walking together, makes me smile .... a smile so big that I think you can "hear" it when I do.
This short time as I drive away from the chaos that is home, to the chaos that can be work ... I enjoy the peace of the car, the radio and the now, familiar, friends on my ride.
#2 - I am thankful for my morning commute
For the last nine years I worked at CSC, I worked remotely, in other words, from home. I know that working from home can sound really glamorous ... working when ever you want, conference calls in your PJs, stuff like that. Don't get me wrong - there was a lot of greatness about it. I thought my morning commute was a positive, I mean it involved walking from the kitchen to the corner of the dining room .. literally seconds and great for fuel economy.
Then I got a job that I needed to actually go to, every day! It is a SHORT, easy commute for me, less than 20 min door to door. I have a safe and reliable car and I really like my job and co-workers, the drive was never a chore.
Sometime in August, after a particularly hectic morning routine at home, I had a bit of an epiphany. This drive every morning is an opportunity to settle myself ... to leave the chaos of 4 people getting ready to head out for the day behind and start the process of charting my course for my work day.
I mostly drive on I-395 but just before I arrive to campus, I turn on this secondary road through a neighborhood. I see the dad and his tiny human waiting for the bus. I drive a little further and I see another dad with his 2 black labs - an old timer and a not so old timer - and his 2 kids. Sometimes the son manages the old timer's leash. I drive a little bit farther, almost to campus, and I find my favorites. There is this adorable elderly couple that walks, holding hands. Seeing them in the morning, walking together, makes me smile .... a smile so big that I think you can "hear" it when I do.
This short time as I drive away from the chaos that is home, to the chaos that can be work ... I enjoy the peace of the car, the radio and the now, familiar, friends on my ride.
#2 - I am thankful for my morning commute
11.01.2016
Hello November
Most Novembers, I dedicate Romanskiville to "Thirty Days of Thanks" and some years .. I actually get all 30 days done ... I'm a busy, work outside of the home mom, what can I say?
Sometimes the posts are super serious, sometimes they are super funny and sometimes there a little screwed up. There was that one time the post was called "Dinner Time" and it included only the picture of a Bud Light Lime. That one was a serious case of not proof-reading.
The last few years I spent a lot of time really becoming the best version of me. I have spent more time focusing on "what I have" rather than "have not." I'm making sure that I'm showing up for the people who show up for me. I've begun to put more trust in my Faith.
Often we get so busy that we start to take things for granted, we forget to be kind and grateful. Earlier this year, we started "highs & lows" .. most nights, usually around the dinner table, we all share our best moment of the day and our lowest. The girls look forward to this, like it's an event, and it starts conversations. Rather than me saying "What'd you do at school today?" and getting "nothing" we have animated discussions.
I encourage you to try this for a month .. you don't have to share them on a blog, your social media, or really anywhere, just spend a moment - when you first get up or right before you turn off your light at night - and think of something that you are thankful for. You might be surprised how it can change your world!
So without further ado, let's get this "Thankful" party started.
Day #1 - I am thankful for an office with a door
Until I started at the college, I never, EVER had an office with a door ... I worked in a cubicle or from my house. I know that might seem like a small thing but sometimes you need to concentrate. Sometimes you need a place to have a private conversation with a student processing the death of their friend. Sometimes you need a time out to get yourself re-centered. Sometimes you might just want to eat your lunch, while it is hot, without conversation.
My door is often wide open and lots of times I'm out at the service desk working with customers but it is nice to know, there is a place, should I need it.
#1 - I am thankful for an office with a door
Sometimes the posts are super serious, sometimes they are super funny and sometimes there a little screwed up. There was that one time the post was called "Dinner Time" and it included only the picture of a Bud Light Lime. That one was a serious case of not proof-reading.
The last few years I spent a lot of time really becoming the best version of me. I have spent more time focusing on "what I have" rather than "have not." I'm making sure that I'm showing up for the people who show up for me. I've begun to put more trust in my Faith.
Often we get so busy that we start to take things for granted, we forget to be kind and grateful. Earlier this year, we started "highs & lows" .. most nights, usually around the dinner table, we all share our best moment of the day and our lowest. The girls look forward to this, like it's an event, and it starts conversations. Rather than me saying "What'd you do at school today?" and getting "nothing" we have animated discussions.
I encourage you to try this for a month .. you don't have to share them on a blog, your social media, or really anywhere, just spend a moment - when you first get up or right before you turn off your light at night - and think of something that you are thankful for. You might be surprised how it can change your world!
So without further ado, let's get this "Thankful" party started.
Day #1 - I am thankful for an office with a door
Until I started at the college, I never, EVER had an office with a door ... I worked in a cubicle or from my house. I know that might seem like a small thing but sometimes you need to concentrate. Sometimes you need a place to have a private conversation with a student processing the death of their friend. Sometimes you need a time out to get yourself re-centered. Sometimes you might just want to eat your lunch, while it is hot, without conversation.
My door is often wide open and lots of times I'm out at the service desk working with customers but it is nice to know, there is a place, should I need it.
#1 - I am thankful for an office with a door
10.04.2016
Breathless
On Sunday, I took the girls to a friend's birthday party at the movie theater. I stood against the wall in the party room, chatting with the other moms. I turned to pick something up or put something down and someone caught my eye.
A tall, thin teenager with long hair walked by. I walked to the door and took a step into the corridor. I wanted to call out to her .... like you see on those dramatic TV series .... when the character thinks they saw the person that is gone. For a fleeting second, I thought she was still physically here. Then I realized it wasn't her, for another second I stopped breathing and it felt like there was a rock on my chest. My friend looked at me and asked if I was OK. I explained, through tears. She put her arm around me and then back to the party we went.
No one saw the turn of events of the summer coming and my life was profoundly impacted by her passing. I think of her often - her beauty, her kindness, her fun-loving spirit, her Grace.
We're different for knowing her and forever changed by the loss of her physical presence.
We'll never be the same, nor would we want to be.
9.17.2016
"répondez, s'il vous plaît"
RSVP ....
What does that really mean? According to my research, it comes from the French phrase "répondez, s'il vous plaît" ... translation [Respond, please]
Generally there is date that you should respond by - you know let the person who issued the invitation know if you'll be there or not.
I struggle with this, well just with the getting people to let me know if they are coming. I have no problem letting people know if we're attending or sending our regrets.
Here are some myths about RSVPing I believe exist ...
Myth 1: When I call to say "Yes" or "No" I will get sucked into a long phone conversation and I don't have time for that
I spend a large majority of my day talking to people - in person AND on the phone. When I get home, I'm not in the mood for a long conversation either.
Call when you know we aren't home and talk to the machine - she hangs up after 60 seconds so that is your maximum commitment. Email or text work too.
Myth 2: If I say "No" they will make me feel guilty or bad for not attending.
Maybe that happens other places, but not here in Romanskiville, we offer guilt-free and no excuse required RSVPs. We're completely satisfied with "We're not coming to xyz." If you don't want to come, a simple no is great. There really is no need to say "I just don't know if I want to come" ... really .. no need for that level of transparency
I want to know how much I'm going to need to buy ... how many plates, favors, pizza and drinks. Now some of that stuff keeps and can be used at other events but not always with the food. If I'm cooking - how much of an effort am I undertaking? If I'm outsourcing food, how much am I ordering? How many cupcakes or what size cake do I need? Who wants to host the party where there isn't enough to eat (we've been to parties like that). I also don't want to order 10 pizzas when 5 would have been plenty. It is a matter of efficiency.
Myth 3: They know we're coming
Actually if you didn't tell us "yes", we don't assume! You've heard that old adage "When you assume, you make an ......." Yeah, that .....
From the middle of August to now, we've had a handful of events - chasing RSVPs every. single. time. One of those events is Brooke's birthday -- where you have to invite the WHOLE class if you send invites through school. Twenty-five invitations went out ... I've heard from TWO parents ... TWO. I'm still waiting for a handful of non school invitees too - not counting the peeps who are vacationing or travelling the USA.
The actual "reply by" date on the invitation is tomorrow so I'm holding out hope for a flurry of text notifications or emails. We'll see.
I should mention that our niece excels at RSVPs, I am certain that she opens the email/envelope, decides if it is of interest, checks her calendar and responds right then. If there was an Olympic event for RSVPs, she would win the gold.
What does that really mean? According to my research, it comes from the French phrase "répondez, s'il vous plaît" ... translation [Respond, please]
Generally there is date that you should respond by - you know let the person who issued the invitation know if you'll be there or not.
I struggle with this, well just with the getting people to let me know if they are coming. I have no problem letting people know if we're attending or sending our regrets.
Here are some myths about RSVPing I believe exist ...
Myth 1: When I call to say "Yes" or "No" I will get sucked into a long phone conversation and I don't have time for that
I spend a large majority of my day talking to people - in person AND on the phone. When I get home, I'm not in the mood for a long conversation either.
Call when you know we aren't home and talk to the machine - she hangs up after 60 seconds so that is your maximum commitment. Email or text work too.
Myth 2: If I say "No" they will make me feel guilty or bad for not attending.
Maybe that happens other places, but not here in Romanskiville, we offer guilt-free and no excuse required RSVPs. We're completely satisfied with "We're not coming to xyz." If you don't want to come, a simple no is great. There really is no need to say "I just don't know if I want to come" ... really .. no need for that level of transparency
I want to know how much I'm going to need to buy ... how many plates, favors, pizza and drinks. Now some of that stuff keeps and can be used at other events but not always with the food. If I'm cooking - how much of an effort am I undertaking? If I'm outsourcing food, how much am I ordering? How many cupcakes or what size cake do I need? Who wants to host the party where there isn't enough to eat (we've been to parties like that). I also don't want to order 10 pizzas when 5 would have been plenty. It is a matter of efficiency.
Myth 3: They know we're coming
Actually if you didn't tell us "yes", we don't assume! You've heard that old adage "When you assume, you make an ......." Yeah, that .....
From the middle of August to now, we've had a handful of events - chasing RSVPs every. single. time. One of those events is Brooke's birthday -- where you have to invite the WHOLE class if you send invites through school. Twenty-five invitations went out ... I've heard from TWO parents ... TWO. I'm still waiting for a handful of non school invitees too - not counting the peeps who are vacationing or travelling the USA.
The actual "reply by" date on the invitation is tomorrow so I'm holding out hope for a flurry of text notifications or emails. We'll see.
I should mention that our niece excels at RSVPs, I am certain that she opens the email/envelope, decides if it is of interest, checks her calendar and responds right then. If there was an Olympic event for RSVPs, she would win the gold.
9.13.2016
Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda
Tonight was the first Board of Ed meeting in Norwich. Want to make any wagers on if I was in attendance?
If you had money on "yes, you were there" .. ding ding ding WINNER!
I spoke during public comment in May - pretty eloquently - imploring the BOE to take a long, hard look at the way they budget AND spend their money. Then I went back in June and, you guessed it, spoke again.
In July, I met with the Superintendent and in August with her and the Chairperson of the BOE.
I'm serious and I'm not going away. I'm passionate about this and will not be deterred.
Last week, I tossed around the idea of speaking at tonight's meeting. I could share with them what I said at Moriarty Back to School night. I could tell them how I issued a challenge to the families to attend ONE more event than they did the previous year and to volunteer one more time. Then I should challenge them, the BOE, to talk to one more parent than they did last year, one more teacher, attend one more event, or return ONE freaking email from an interested, engaged parent.
After writing Highs and Lows, I thought I could share that with them. Tell them that the highs and lows that are getting shared around my table all relate to their time at school. They love music, technology, gym, and writing. The lows are things like "when we were done with our science experiment" or "when I had to leave school for the day - I LOVE school" I would tell them that I do not think I have a unique experience, that my kids are representative of many our students. That our staff is doing really AMAZING work and it shows in our students.
So after thoughtful deliberation, I decided not to speak at all .. I figured who wants to get the reputation for being "that mother" who is always complaining.
Tonight I attended the meeting, I listened, I took notes. There are things I heard that make me shake my head .. I heard things that literally wanted to send me running from the room, hands in the air, screaming. There were things I heard that made me believe - there is much work to do.
I got in my car to head home and thought .. I should have. I could have. If I could do it again, I would .....
I'm not dwelling on the the shoulda, coulda, woulda ... it might be different next time.
If you had money on "yes, you were there" .. ding ding ding WINNER!
I spoke during public comment in May - pretty eloquently - imploring the BOE to take a long, hard look at the way they budget AND spend their money. Then I went back in June and, you guessed it, spoke again.
In July, I met with the Superintendent and in August with her and the Chairperson of the BOE.
I'm serious and I'm not going away. I'm passionate about this and will not be deterred.
Last week, I tossed around the idea of speaking at tonight's meeting. I could share with them what I said at Moriarty Back to School night. I could tell them how I issued a challenge to the families to attend ONE more event than they did the previous year and to volunteer one more time. Then I should challenge them, the BOE, to talk to one more parent than they did last year, one more teacher, attend one more event, or return ONE freaking email from an interested, engaged parent.
After writing Highs and Lows, I thought I could share that with them. Tell them that the highs and lows that are getting shared around my table all relate to their time at school. They love music, technology, gym, and writing. The lows are things like "when we were done with our science experiment" or "when I had to leave school for the day - I LOVE school" I would tell them that I do not think I have a unique experience, that my kids are representative of many our students. That our staff is doing really AMAZING work and it shows in our students.
So after thoughtful deliberation, I decided not to speak at all .. I figured who wants to get the reputation for being "that mother" who is always complaining.
Tonight I attended the meeting, I listened, I took notes. There are things I heard that make me shake my head .. I heard things that literally wanted to send me running from the room, hands in the air, screaming. There were things I heard that made me believe - there is much work to do.
I got in my car to head home and thought .. I should have. I could have. If I could do it again, I would .....
I'm not dwelling on the the shoulda, coulda, woulda ... it might be different next time.
9.07.2016
Highs and Lows
Before I met Paul and while he was going through his divorce he was adopted by some friends from the neighborhood. They invited him to dinner, to family game night - they were really good to him during a difficult time. One of their family "traditions" was to go around the dinner table and share their "highs and lows" - what was the best thing that happened today? what was your low? I can remember Paul smiling when he shared the experience with me. I tried this in the old house - I'm not sure how old the girls were - but they were too little. Their high was often their low too. Sometimes when you said "what was the best thing that happened to you today? you got "can I have more melon?"
Last night I decided to give it another whirl, I mean we have big girls now.
SUCCESS! Tonight, after rain chased us from the Soccer field, we warmed up with soup and grilled cheese. Kristen was done first.
"May I be excused?"
"No, you have to stay at the table and talk to your sister and I" I said.
She sighs - annoyed - then Brooke remembers highs and lows.
"We have to do highs and lows Kristen. What was your high?"
"Art - we started our fish habitats" Kristen shares with a big smile. Brooke and I share. Then we share lows. Tonight they each had a "low LOW" .... they both said "having to leave school at the end of the day"
[I hope you read this Mrs. Pellerin]
I love the conversation it generates. I love that it gives me an opportunity to help them hone their critical thinking skills. What about that made you so happy? Why was that your low? Why is leaving school at the end of the day your low? We are engaging in conversation and they are enjoying it.
I'm committed to making these little moments more regular. To creating these experiences that, I hope, help shape them into kind and thoughtful tiny humans.
"There's never enough time for what matters, but there is always time for what matters most"
Yes, there absolutely is.
Last night I decided to give it another whirl, I mean we have big girls now.
SUCCESS! Tonight, after rain chased us from the Soccer field, we warmed up with soup and grilled cheese. Kristen was done first.
"May I be excused?"
"No, you have to stay at the table and talk to your sister and I" I said.
She sighs - annoyed - then Brooke remembers highs and lows.
"We have to do highs and lows Kristen. What was your high?"
"Art - we started our fish habitats" Kristen shares with a big smile. Brooke and I share. Then we share lows. Tonight they each had a "low LOW" .... they both said "having to leave school at the end of the day"
[I hope you read this Mrs. Pellerin]
I love the conversation it generates. I love that it gives me an opportunity to help them hone their critical thinking skills. What about that made you so happy? Why was that your low? Why is leaving school at the end of the day your low? We are engaging in conversation and they are enjoying it.
I'm committed to making these little moments more regular. To creating these experiences that, I hope, help shape them into kind and thoughtful tiny humans.
"There's never enough time for what matters, but there is always time for what matters most"
Yes, there absolutely is.
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