Back to School Night

Tonight was the Back to School BBQ at Moriarty Magnet School. As president of the PTO, I speak and try to get more people helping our cause. I also take time to acknowledge our faculty and staff. I genuinely believe that the staff at Moriarty are some of the FINEST in the business and I thank my lucky stars EVERY day that this is where Brooke and Kristen spend their days. I was a little overwhelmed by the turnout .... I have to tell you that cafeteria WAS PACKED ... for a second it took my breath away. 

I was making the rounds visiting classrooms and referred to my "speech" it was only then I realized most of the people I was praising were in their classrooms, anxiously awaiting their new students. So here it is ... I hope every Moriarty Environmental Sciences Magnet School teacher reads this and has some small idea of how much their work is valued. 

Good Evening - It is so exciting to see so many of you here tonight! I’m Heather Romanski, PTO President and mom to a 2nd and 5th grader here at Moriarty Environmental Sciences Magnet School or should I say “the Nationally Recognized Moriarty Environmental Sciences Magnet School”  I don’t know about you, but I am so proud of the hard work and dedication of our faculty and staff that went into winning that award in May 2016.  Please join me in a round of applause for these AMAZING people!

If you are new to Moriarty, you are in for quite a treat. Our children spend their days with some of the finest educators I’ve had the privilege to work with. We are so fortunate that our staff is full of smart, caring, innovative and resourceful teachers. Our faculty and staff has one of the MOST important jobs there is, they are training our future scientists, engineers, computer programmers and environmental activists. One day a Moriarty Alum might be the superintendent of a school district, a senator, or an olympic athlete. Did you know that a student who studied at Moriarty just competed in the Summer Olympics in Rio?  

Research shows that students perform better when their families are engaged. This year, I’m challenging you to volunteer one more time than you did last year. Just one more time. To attend ONE more event than you did last year. I’m asking you to be an active partner in our Moriarty Family, because that's what we are here - a family. We’re looking for help across the board … cutting up boxtops, helping in our gardens, helping our students compost, or helping to staff our book fair. Maybe you have an amazing idea to engage and excite our community...please share it! We’d love to have you stop in at a PTO meeting, but if that isn’t your thing - we’ll find a way for you to share your talents or your time.

Thanks so much - hope to see you soon!

Where I'm Supposed to Be

Celebrating every day things. Being content with what you have. Making time for what is important. Not settling. Being the best I can be for me, so that I can be the best I can for my husband and my girls. 

This is my mission statement. This is what matters most. 

This shift started when I filed for divorce in 2001 .... I was never going to find the happiness, mutual respect or love that everyone dreams of there. I lost a lot when I left that marriage - mostly material things. I came to terms with that pretty quickly and can remember saying to someone who was having a harder time watching me grieve my relationship -  "It's stuff. In 10 years from now I'm going to be remarried, have the family I've longed for, and be living my happily ever after. In 10 years, he's going to have my STUFF .. I think I actually said F$%^ING STUFF." Then I met Paul, and  we went out, and then there was that time we talked on the phone for 5 hours .... then I moved in, a proposal, a wedding, a baby, a promotion, another baby .... Guess what ... ten years later, I WAS living my happily ever after and, the ex, he had been married and divorced for the 5th time. 

In 2012, we designed and built a house that we love. It was another dream come true. We were enjoying our space and and loving our time together as "The Core Four". There were changes at work and I was growing increasingly unhappy, but I had achieved so much success and the salary that came with that - we weren't in a position where I could just walk away. 

In 2014 the decision was made for me. A Thursday morning meeting and Friday was my last day. In all honesty, I think that was emotionally harder to deal with than my divorce. Have you ever been laid off? It hurts your feelings, like you added no value, that your contributions were inconsequential. If I had not already known that I was with the right guy - that time - was the icing on the cake. Never got angry, never showed stress, never let the circumstances get the best of him. When I interviewed and didn't get an offer he would shake his head and smile and say "boy did they miss out" or "whoever they picked - not gonna do the job you would have"... and when he said it, he believed it. That makes you believe it and that my friends is the best gift ever. 

In January 2015, I was offered an IT job on a college campus. I accepted the job - not only did I think I would be good at it but it was close to home and the thought of commuting back and forth to Hartford made my head hurt. It took me a while to figure things out -- higher ed was all new -- but then things started to fall into place. I know how to do my job and I do it well. My role marries the 2 things that bring me joy - technology and people. My colleagues have become fast friends. 

Yesterday, the first year students moved in. Campus is congested, the Service Desk is BUSY, and there are times when it is just plain chaotic. In a quiet moment, I sent a chat message to co-worker and said "I know this is going to sound crazy - I LOVE move-in day!" 

It took some time and the road was twisted and rocky, but here I am living the dream ... married to the man I am "supposed" to be married to and doing the work that was made for me. 

I'm where I'm supposed to be ...... Amen.

You are So Beautiful

A girl's self esteem peaks at AGE 9

62% of girls are insecure

2% of women describe themselves as beautiful

91% of women hate their bodies

As a woman and a mother of two beautiful daughters ... these statistics speak to me.

Earlier tonight a friend shared this trailer for a film called Embrace .. WOW! 

I was so moved as I watched it. I hope you'll click on the link above and watch for the 2 minutes it plays. 

I used to be skinny. It is unfortunate that I can't find a picture of me in the little black dress I wore to my 30th birthday party .. smokin' hot. Then I had a baby, a second baby and then I turned 40. You're pulled in a million directions and your metabolism retires. 

A few years ago, I decided I was going to start running again. I wanted to lose weight, I wanted to be that skinny girl in the black dress that turned heads when she walked to the bar to get a drink and I did. Well, I didn't get THAT skinny but I dropped close to 30 pounds. It lasted for a while and then it was back. 

In January, I got serious again about exercise. The motivation was different this time - my knees hurt, my feet hurt, I was tired of low energy. It wasn't so much about the weight, more about being fit and strong. It was more about protecting what I had from all the "stuff" that I'm predisposed to like joint problems and osteoporosis. 

This summer I've lost a bit of my focus - the humidity was obnoxious, we stay up too late making it hard to get up early, and we lost someone so dear to our family and, frankly, I was just sad. 

Then a 2 minute and 12 second movie trailer shows up on my Facebook feed. It reminded me that beauty is so much more than the exterior, than a number on the scale, than a size on the tag of the that not-so little black dress. 

I'm beautiful [and it is really hard to type that, even now] but I AM. I am kind. I am thoughtful. I am generous. I am funny. I am a nurturer. I am a thinker. I am a dreamer. I am a Do'er. I am an advocate. I am passionate. I am a provider. I am a good friend. I am a runner. I am a fighter. I am strong. I AM beautiful. 

"This body of mine - it's not an ornament, it's a vehicle" Taryn Brumfitt

Why does this move me?  Because A girl's self esteem peaks at AGE 9 ... on September 3rd, my daughter, turns 10. 

So to my daughter I offer Taryn's words:

You might not be the skinniest or the fastest but this body of yours - it's not an ornament, it's a vehicle. It will take you places and "Darling Girl, don't waste a single day being at war with your body, just embrace it"

#Ihaveembraced

It Only Takes A Spark ....

Tonight was the last Board of Education meeting in Norwich before they adjourn for the summer. Would you be surprised to learn that I signed up for "Public Comment?" I take this all very seriously, for example, I prepare my words a few days ahead of time, I edit them, I have others read them and I practice reading my words out loud.  After last month's "wrap it up" incident .. I even researched the time guidelines and timed my practice rounds. I was well under the published 5 minute limit and carried my phone to the table with me, ya know, so I could keep my pace in check. 

I read my remarks, looked up, and from time to time would glance at my phone ... on target ... so I pushed on. I turned to my last page with just a few sentences ... I got the dreaded "wrap it up.' Clearly my interpretation of 5 minutes and the timekeeper's vary, I've emailed the ENTIRE Board and attached their policy document where 5 minutes is clearly communicated.  We'll see, I'm sure nothing will change, but I feel better for saying something and sometimes you have to be happy with that. 

I shared my sadness that the Magnet Theme Coach would not be returning in the Fall because our our district finances. That, combined with plans to change the physical structures of our schools, felt like a lack of support for the Magnet Schools in our district. I reminded them that many Norwich kids are leaving for out of district Magnet schools -- some 233ish and how that is a financial burden to our education budget. 

Earlier this year, our School, Moriarty Environmental Sciences Magnet School won a national award. The was the cumulative efforts of students, staff and good leadership. I have no doubt that Moriarty will have continued success, the remaining staff will rise to the occasion and things will go on, but I can assure you it will be different. 

I only worked with Erin for a short time but we became fast friends. She is smart, energetic, and is an engaging and enthusiastic educator. She was patient with me -- who might have showed up with a tiny bit of arrogance -- how hard can this be? OH. MY. GOODNESS. Let me tell you folks ... being in that school all day - is hard, designing lesson plans and activities that adhere to this standard or that - HARD .... getting people to give you stuff for FREE .. HARD. Getting the Tiny Humans to sit, listen and learn .. HARDER. 

Doing what is right .. HARDEST. Erin made me think about education in a different way. She challenged me to be a forward thinker when it came to the way my girls are taught. Why this way and not that? Why should we continue to do it like this just because we always have done it this way. Are you sure there isn't a better way? 

She quietly encouraged me to speak out and be heard. She has had a hand in the creation of this "accidental advocate" and has helped me find a voice - not only for my kids, but for our district as a whole. 

I emailed her earlier tonight - mainly because I still cannot believe she is GONE from our district - but also to let her know that she had been the spark that has started a fire. I also shared what I read, because "someone" texted her and told her that I spoke at the BOE meeting about her. 

I said what I said at that meeting because I wanted to make sure the Board knew that we had lost an asset but in all honesty, I know it won't save her job.

"The good you do today, will often be forgotten.  Do good anyway.


Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.  Give your best anyway." Mother Teresa

So Erin, I say to you .. you did good and I will not let it be forgotten. You gave us your best and it was enough. 

You encouraged me to take a stand for one of the most important things in the world - the education of my kids. You were the spark that started this fire ... and I promise you ... I will continue to let it burn!

Because our Kids Deserve It

Norwich Board of Ed - Public Comment - June 2016

As you may remember, I have 2 daughters that attend Moriarty Environmental Sciences Magnet School. The same school that was recognized, nationally, at the Magnet Schools of America Conference in May.

Tonight I share with you my concerns about decisions that are being made that I believe are counterproductive to its continued success. It is no secret that when the decision to transition to a Magnet School was made, I did not support it. Over the course of the last few years, I have seen some amazing changes and have grown into one of Moriarty’s strongest advocates.

Moriarty Environmental Science Magnet School was not a “start-up” Magnet, it has had to transition using the staff and the infrastructure they had. Clearly they are making it work and that is not only evident to parents and students but to educators in the field as well - hence a national award. The reason they are a success is because there is an intensely collaborative mindset that encompasses students, staff, administration and families. Spearheading this Magnet transition was Magnet Theme Coach, Erin Conley.  Sadly, Ms. Conley will not be returning in the Fall since the budget was not able to provide the funding for her position. It is unfortunate that she will be absent - she brought with her an extensive Magnet School teaching and planning background. She has authored and co-authored curricula that are being used across the state. She is a gem not only to Moriarty but to our entire district.

I am also extremely concerned about the proposals under review by our facilities review committee -- there are at least 2 options - that make no allowance for the continuation of either of our Magnet Schools. If we’re evaluating facilities, maybe this is an opportunity for us to make long range plans to move to an inter-district magnet program. Last month

I spoke about fiscal responsibility. If the Board continues to support the Magnet programs we have, they can potentially provide much needed revenue. Not only does this benefit our children, but could provide some relief to our over-stressed budget.

There are waiting lists for the 2 magnet schools in our district and we all know that when families are evaluating the town they will call home, the quality of the schools is a major factor. These programs boost the reputation of our city. I wonder why the administration and staff at both Moriarty and Wequonnoc were allowed to make this leap of faith investing their energy and efforts into developing these amazing and engaging programs if there was no plan to sustain them long term.  You cannot deny the large numbers of students leaving Norwich to attend Magnet schools in surrounding towns and that the business of education has become competitive.  It seems silly to let an opportunity slip by and not fully support the Magnets we have. Then we too can have students coming from other towns which will help to sustain our schools.

The students at Moriarty are learning by doing to be stewards of the world around them they know where food comes from, how important it is to recycle and how to be problem solvers. One of the most surprising things to me was how the infusion of a theme has not only changed our school, but it is changing many of our homes. My girls encourage our family to reduce and recycle. They encourage us to support our local farms and to think more about waste. Moriarty is training our future Scientists, Civil Engineers, Programmers, and Environmental Activists. They are making a STEM education interesting and exciting. They are changing the lives of the students AND families that are lucky enough to call Moriarty home. Please continue to honor and respect the commitment that the Board of Education made to this approach to education.

Happy Trails

Bright and early Saturday morning, my parents climbed into their RV and headed out for their next adventure. They'll return to Connecticut sometime in mid-September, yes, you read that correctly SEPTEMBER! They are taking the next 4 weeks to make their way across the US, they need to be in Washington State by June 20. 

There they will join a caravan of RVs and on June 22 they all head out on a 62 Day - Alaska Your Way tour. Sometimes they will be in camping resorts with lots of amenities and I think at least one night they stay in a park without ANY hookups. Don't worry about them though ... this is their home for this adventure. It has a sleep number bed, high end convection oven, a washer, dryer and 3 flat screen TVs. It has a generator and everything else you might need. They'll really be just fine.

Home Sweet Home

My parents have been living the dream since their retirements in 2010. They spend the winter in Florida and most of the summer camped along the Cape Cod Canal until this year when they will make this cross-country, international journey. 

Computers, free WiFi and Facetime make the separation a little bit easier to manage. I think the hardest part for me will be these 4 weeks it takes to get to WA -- there is no real agenda, they have an approximate route, but nothing set in stone. They only had reservations the first 2 nights. They wanted to be able to chart the course as they drove .. um that is not really the way my dad operates so this could be interesting. 

I miss them so much when they are away but I am so grateful that they are getting this time together. I honestly didn't realize until it happened how much their retirement would change my life. It isn't better, it isn't worse .. it is just different. 

As long as I can remember, my dad has talked about traveling the US in a motorhome and going to state parks and national monuments when he retired. How many people get to dream that big and then live out those dreams. I am fairly certain that it doesn't happen to too many. For them it didn't happen accidentally, it was the result of a lot of hard work, planning and sacrifice along the way.... I am so happy that the people who worked so hard to provide what I needed, when I needed it are out on the open road. 

Life is too short to not lean over and grab that brass ring. 

You can follow the journey on their Facebook Page, Doing Alaska Our Way

Let's Get Physical

In January, I started going to a cardio & strength training class taught by a colleague during our lunch time. Not gonna lie, when it started on January 4th I was worried --- about being able to get through the hour class but, maybe even more so, the walk back to my office from the Athletic Center. All. Up. Hill.

When class started there were a lot of us. The first few weeks I had to modify almost every exercise ... planks on knees, push-ups on knees, and sometimes I just marched in place. 

As the weeks wore on, the group started to shrink. A core few attended almost every session. I started to be able to do more of the exercises and my weights got heavier. When I had to miss a session I was legitimately irritated. 

Thursday is our last class until the Fall Semester. I am sad. I will miss the adrenaline rush, I will miss sweating, I will miss the frustration of not being able to do a whole set of a new, harder exercise. I will miss the satisfaction of being able to do something I could not do a week before. 

Today, another colleague finished his workout early and he came outside to where we were having our class. I caught him videotaping us .. I was NOT happy and might have flipped him off (with BOTH hands) but we kept on. Earlier tonight he shared those videos with us and said something about hoping that we appreciated what we had accomplished .. that he knew what we did with our trainer twice a week was not a walk in the park .. he implied that we should be proud. I looked at all 6 little snippets of video that he shared with us ... I was prepared to give him a piece of my mind, but ya know what ... they weren't so bad. 

I have a plan to keep this new found strength going and growing .... and I WILL beat her, I WILL train harder, I've lost before .. but not this time.

SHE. IS. GOING. DOWN.